Top G Reasons I Hate Numbers
This one's just for fun, while I finish up some more serious projects. Tired of Top 10 lists? Sure, some people try to hide them with "Top 100" or "Top 7", but why should numbers have all the fun? Here are G reasons why I hate numbers:A. Numbers Are Sooo 9th Century
What's next, hieroglyphics? All the cool kids are using animated emoticons, or space numbers, or some other thing you aren't cool enough to understand.
B. Count von Count
Remember The Count from Sesame Street? That guy was scary. Anyone that old who laughs like a maniac every time he counts to 3 just isn't right in the head.
C. The Base-10 Conspiracy
For too long, the 10-digit system has enslaved us. Some intrepid programmers tried to fight it in the 70s with binary, but they were punished for their hubris by being locked away in cubicles and forbidden from having girlfriends.
D. Standardized Testing
Remember the SAT, ACT, GRE, MCAT, LSAT, etc., and how that one number determined your entire future? How messed up was that?
E. The Bathroom Scale
What sadist thought that staring at your weight would be a great way to start the day? If I was in charge, we would all have magic mirrors like in Snow White that said things like "Hey, big guy, lookin' good!"
F. The Romans Were Cool
Seriously, have you watched the History Channel? Who wants to write Copyright ©1988 at the end of a movie when they can put "MCMLXXXVIII"?
G. Numbers Are to Blame
The stock market is plummeting, your home is worthless, and you lost the Lotto (again). What do these things have in common? Numbers. That's right - numbers are to blame for pretty much every problem you have right now.
Sean
· Tuesday, March 17I so enjoyed this. Time to put numbers in their proper place and show them there are other ways for us to organize stuff.
MikeTek
· Tuesday, March 17Bam, another Semmy nod for Dr. Pete!
H. Tax season - reason enough alone to hate numbers.
ps Count von Count was pimp.
Dr. Pete
· Tuesday, March 17@Sean - I wonder what killed Roman numerals for organizing? Probably long division, which is also evil.
@MikeTek - Sorry, didn't mean to make fun of Sesame Street. Truth be told, I love the Count.
Steven Bradley
· Tuesday, March 17I really want to see a top list using hieroglyphics for organization. Now that would be cool.
Kim M.
· Tuesday, March 17Dr. Pete, I am sending Chuck Norris over right now to kick you in the throat. Hatin' on numbers. Ugh. Not cool. Not cool!
Dr. Pete
· Wednesday, March 18@Steven - Next up: "Top Ankh Coolest Pharaohs" ;)
@Kim - It's not a really good blog post until someone threatens to punch me in the neck. Numbers will forgive me - they know I love them.
Will Critchlow
· Wednesday, March 18i think e is onto something.
Sorry. Attempts at mathematics jokes shouldn't be allowed.
Eric
· Wednesday, March 18The Count (pictured above) is coming for you, number-hater. Be afraid, be very afraid.
Dan Gorgone
· Monday, April 20When in doubt, children know what's best. Ever ask a toddler a number question? They don't answer with a number; they hold up their fingers and say "This many." Not sure what that means, but it sounds good.
rischaad
· Thursday, October 22What do you get if you divide the cirucmference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin Pi!